Take advantage of all of the exciting Events we have coming up.

In addition to all the other Parties, every Monday, Wednesday and Friday we will have Mini Action Parties in the ChatRoom. The focus of our Mini Parties is to come together as a group and take Action on the simple things in life that may, at times, get pushed back until it is out of control, such as Cleaning Parties, Organization Parties, Meal Planning Parties, Coupon Parties, Goddess Parties (Self Care) and more.

Because this is a community where we All count, everyone is encouraged to reach out to each other and start making new friends and opening yourself up to a greater sense of community. The purpose here is to encourage and support each other, which will turn into lifetime friendships.

You have absolutely nothing to lose other than the things that hold you back, so get in here and join us now, we can’t wait to get this party started!

Click Here to Join Us Now

There’s more to decor than meets the eye. We went to the pros for tips on how to make your space a tranquil retreat—and the tools you need to pull it off.

Picture it: A place that makes you smile as soon as you enter. Stress melts away, and you’re overcome with a sense of comfort.

Reality check: It’s your own house.

Believe it or not, it’s possible, and there’s a whole science fueling
this quest to make home sweet home happen. Dubbed “design psychology,”
it explores how the environment affects people emotionally and how
designing your space can make you feel happy. “The things we do
consciously to arrange the places we live in can infuse us with a
feeling of well-being,” says Constance Forrest, Psy.D., of the
California design psychology practice ForrestPainter Design. Here’s
how to make your home a haven.

Brush up with color. Leatrice Eiseman, author of Colors for Your
Every Mood suggests using a serene hue like periwinkle blue, the
color she painted her own bedroom.

Why: “In most people’s minds, blue is the color of the sky, the
sea—those things in the world we can always depend on,” Eiseman
explains. Spice up the room with a complement like apricot; a
designer rule-of-thumb is that a single color should dominate only
75 percent of the room.

Try: Benjamin Moore’s “California Lilac” and “Southern Charm”
($25 to $40 per gallon).

Plant seeds of serenity. Incorporate live plants and natural
materials. “Associations with the natural world are soothing and
grounding,” Forrest says.

Why: Toby Israel, Ph.D. and author of the design psychology
how-to book Some Place Like Home, suggests this hankering for
greenery harks back to childhood, when the outdoors represented a
wonderland escape.

Try: An easy-to-tend philodendron, Christmas cactus, or spider
plant. Even the warmth of hardwood floors lends a natural feel.

Shine on. The wrong lighting can kill the charm in any room.

Why: Brett Pransky, a New York City designer who’s fashioned sets
for Sex and the City, Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, and Mona
Lisa Smile, says the most common mistake is to rely solely on
overhead lighting, which throws harsh shadows. “Lamps should be
spread around the room to create balance and ambiance,” Pransky
says.

Try: Simon Pearce’s sleek, shaded glass lamp ($125), or scour
thrift shops for offbeat, conversation pieces.

Go with the flow. Arrange and organize your space so people feel
at ease.

Why: Israel distinguishes the three kinds of spaces you need to
balance: private, public, and shared (such as a playroom or den).
“An overload of shared or public space is unhealthy,” she says.
“We need to establish those personal-space boundaries.”

Try: Make sure your kitchen has an inviting table or counter so
your clan can gather ’round while the meal’s in the make. Snag
tabletop trays (Crate & Barrel, $7.95) and chic storage bins you
can label (The Container Store, $21.99) so everyone can get to
things in a jiffy.

Play favorites. In the end, the space should reflect your
personality—not some swanky designer’s.

Why: “Using design elements that reflect you can make you feel
connected to that space,” Israel says. The opposite holds true,
too: “If a house doesn’t reflect who you are, you may not feel
like you belong there.”

Try: Stow memory-laden objects around your house, whether that’s
a collection of antique vases, a favorite novel, or childhood
keepsakes (like the wooden toy train Pransky displays on his mantle.)

Business today is more hectic than ever before. Corporations are streamlining their workforce, leaving remaining employees overwhelmed with the extra work to make up the slack. Learning to manage your time will not only help keep your regular work flowing, but will free up time for special projects as well.

But how do you organize your time when you are under pressure? It’s not easy when you are being pulled in several directions at one time. Here are some tips for managing your time better.

1. Start managing your time today. Don’t wait until next week or even tomorrow. There is no time like the present to put these valuable tools into action.

2. Get into a routine. Take care of your normal tasks at the same time each day to help you stay focused and organized when the emergency projects come up.

3. Don’t bite off more than you can chew. Only volunteer for tasks you can work into your schedule. If you are overworked, don’t offer to help.

4. Break down a large project into more manageable pieces. Organizing each project into smaller tasks will make the project easier to finish on time.

5. Do not make a project more difficult than it has to be. Perfection is expected in the finished product, but not necessary during the start of the project. Look at what is expected in regards to the project and don’t add more to it.

6. Deal with tasks when you get them. Don’t wait until the last minute to start a job. One of the biggest time wasters is starting and stopping projects. The more times you start the same project, the more time you’ll waste repeating the same work over and over.

7. Figure out how much time a project should take to complete, then schedule blocks of time during your days to complete it. Some projects will have to be finished as soon as possible, while other
tasks can be worked on over a period of time. Scheduling both kinds of tasks into your day’s activities will make finishing them much easier.

8. Plan your activities. Using a calendar, computer program, or even a PDA will help you keep track of your tasks and when they are due. When planning your activities, be sure to schedule time for breaks, lunch, interruptions, and meetings regarding your projects.

9. Make a master to-do list. On a pad of lined paper, list the things you need to do for each project you have and place an estimated time of completion next to it.

10. Learn to delegate as much as you can. Most of the time, your projects will be ones you have to accomplish on your own, but there might be times you can delegate tasks like gathering information to co-workers.

Having a good handle on your business projects will make you a better worker and more valuable; for your employer and for your career.

Relationship mastery requires that you learn how to maturely
protect your boundaries. Mature boundaries are an important
ingredient of Self-mastery. If you never learned how to
maturely protect your boundaries, you’ll be forced to use
childlike ego defenses. The most important ability in the
development of healthy boundaries is to master how to
communicate your feelings.

A boundary is a limit that promotes integrity. Healthy
boundaries come from your conscious awareness of the
distinction between you and the people with whom you share
your life. Boundaries protect you and make you feel safe.
There are two types of boundaries: Physical Boundaries and
Emotional Boundaries. Physical Boundaries are based on the
invisible three-foot comfort zone that surrounds you. This is
your physical boundary of safety that you (and others) need to
feel safe. Emotional Boundaries separate you from others
emotionally and psychologically. Your ego-mind creates a sense
of personal space and separation from others in order to help
you feel physically safe and prevents emotional enmeshment with
others. When someone violates your physical or emotional
boundaries without your permission, you feel uncomfortable-perhaps
even threatened. Spiritual relationships requires you to honor the
need for physical and emotional boundaries in others and themselves.

When someone trespasses your boundaries by thoughtless or intrusive
actions these actions are called… boundary violations.

There are TWO TYPES OF BOUNDARY VIOLATIONS: Violations of intrusion and violations of emotional distance:

1. Violations of Intrusion happen when a person is verbally,
emotionally, sexually, or physically abused or enmeshed.

2. Violations of Emotional Distance occur when emotional intimacy is
less than what is appropriate for the relationship. Emotional distance
is harmful, especially with children. A child has the right to expect
closeness and emotional intimacy from her caretakers, and when it is
excessively removed or cut off, it hurts and it becomes emotionally
harmful. For example, when you were a child, if your parents only
talked to you to give you orders or to reprimand you, this would be
a violation of emotional distance. Children and adults need hugs,
affection and emotional intimacy from there parents in order to feel
safe and secure.

Violations of Emotional Distance are difficult to validate because these wounds were caused by… “What wasn’t done to you.”

When you were a child, you did not have the power or wisdom to stop
others from transgressing your boundaries. Adults could do as they
wished with you because you were powerless to stop them. Now that
you are an adult, you are able to use your adult powers to set
mature, functional boundaries so that you can feel safe, sane and
secure in the world.

Often____ when a child’s boundaries are violated it is allowed to
continue because the child has not been taught that he/she has the
right to say “no” when his/her boundaries have been breached. If
you were not given permission as a child to say “no” to protect
your boundaries then you’ll need to practice corrective Self-parenting
boundary exercises.

Emotional boundaries help you to stay safe by stopping you from
becoming enmeshed in the fear based ideas and behaviors of others.
Emotional boundaries tie directly to your belief systems. It is
important that you discern what beliefs belong to you from those
that originate from others. Your mind will treat all of your
beliefs indiscriminately and act on them accordingly. Since your mind
does not care whether a belief is yours or another’s (such as a
parent, unless you program it otherwise, it will create a reality that
you may or may not wish to participate in. Because of this, you can
become emotionally enmeshed in the beliefs of others to the point
that it will create dysfunctional programming in your life. A
Relationship Mastered person recognizes the importance of not
imposing their beliefs upon others because they realize that it is
an emotional boundary violation. This does not mean that you cannot
express your beliefs: it just means that you should not overly
insist, impose, or try to manipulate another into accepting your
point of view____ and belief systems.

Namaste, my soul friends….. Hu Dalconzo

Stress is the “wear and tear” our bodies experience as we adjust to our continually changing environment; it has physical and emotional effects on us and can create positive or negative feelings. As a positive influence, stress can help compel us to action; it can result in a new awareness and an exciting new perspective. As a negative influence, it can result in feelings of distrust, rejection, anger, and depression, which in turn can lead to health problems such as headaches, upset stomach, rashes, insomnia, ulcers, high blood pressure, heart disease, and stroke. With the death of a loved one, the birth of a child, a job promotion, or a new relationship, we experience stress as we readjust our lives. In so adjusting to different circumstances, stress will help or hinder us depending on how we react to it.

How Can I Eliminate Stress from My Life?
As we have seen, positive stress adds anticipation and excitement to life, and we all thrive under a certain amount of stress. Deadlines, competitions, confrontations, and even our frustrations and sorrows add depth and enrichment to our lives. Our goal is not to eliminate stress but to learn how to manage it and how to use it to help us. Insufficient stress acts as a depressant and may leave us feeling bored or dejected; on the other hand, excessive stress may leave us feeling “tied up in knots.” What we need to do is find the optimal level of stress which will individually motivate but not overwhelm each of us.

How Can I Tell What is Optimal Stress for Me?
There is no single level of stress that is optimal for all people. We are all individual creatures with unique requirements. As such, what is distressing to one may be a joy to another. And even when we agree that a particular event is distressing, we are likely to differ in our physiological and psychological responses to it.

The person who loves to arbitrate disputes and moves from job site to job site would be stressed in a job which was stable and routine, whereas the person who thrives under stable conditions would very likely be stressed on a job where duties were highly varied. Also, our personal stress requirements and the amount which we can tolerate before we become distressed changes with our ages.

It has been found that most illness is related to unrelieved stress. If you are experiencing stress symptoms, you have gone beyond your optimal stress level; you need to reduce the stress in your life and/or improve your ability to manage it.

How Can I Manage Stress Better?
Identifying unrelieved stress and being aware of its effect on our lives is not sufficient for reducing its harmful effects. Just as there are many sources of stress, there are many possibilities for its management. However, all require work toward change: changing the source of stress and/or changing your reaction to it. How do you proceed?

1. Become aware of your stressors and your emotional and physical
reactions. Notice your distress. Don’t ignore it. Don’t gloss over your problems. Determine what events distress you. What are you telling yourself about meaning of these events? Determine how your body responds to the stress. Do you become nervous or physically upset? If so, in what specific ways?

2. Recognize what you can change.
Can you change your stressors by avoiding or eliminating them completely? Can you reduce their intensity (manage them over a period of time instead of on a daily or weekly basis)? Can you shorten your exposure to stress (take a break, leave the physical premises)? Can you devote the time and energy necessary to making a change (goal setting, time management techniques, and delayed gratification strategies may be helpful here)?

3. Reduce the intensity of your emotional reactions to stress.
The stress reaction is triggered by your perception of danger…physical danger and/or emotional danger. Are you viewing your stressors in exaggerated terms and/or taking a difficult situation
and making it a disaster?

Are you expecting to please everyone?
Are you overreacting and viewing things as absolutely critical and urgent? Do you feel you must always prevail in every situation? Work at adopting more moderate views; try to see the stress as something you can cope with rather than something that overpowers you. Try to temper your excess emotions. Put the situation in perspective. Do not labor on the negative aspects and the “what if’s.”

4. Learn to moderate your physical reactions to stress.
Slow, deep breathing will bring your heart rate and respiration back to normal. Relaxation techniques can reduce muscle tension. Electronic biofeedback can help you gain voluntary control over such things as muscle tension, heart rate, and blood pressure. Medications, when prescribed by a physician, can help in the short term in moderating your physical reactions. However, they alone are not the answer. Learning to moderate these reactions on your own is a preferable long-term solution.

5. Build your physical reserves.
Exercise for cardiovascular fitness three to four times a week (moderate, prolonged rhythmic exercise is best, such as walking, swimming, cycling, or jogging). Eat well-balanced, nutritious meals.
Maintain your ideal weight. Avoid nicotine, excessive caffeine, and other stimulants. Mix leisure with work. Take breaks and get away when you can. Get enough sleep. Be as consistent with your sleep schedule as
possible.

6. Maintain your emotional reserves.
Develop some mutually supportive friendships/relationships. Pursue realistic goals which are meaningful to you, rather than goals others have for you that you do not share. Expect some frustrations, failures, and sorrows. Always be kind and gentle with yourself — be a friend to yourself.

As you can see, we are still moving the site over to this new blog. So, in the meantime, please enjoy what is here and we will keep you updated on the move.

Until later, Make it a great day!
Peace, Laurie